MIXED MARRIAGES
Sseguya Francis O.F.M cap
In our discussion today, we looked at the questions concerning mixed marriages based on the Directory for the Application of Principles and Norms of Ecumenism. Mixed marriages are explained very well in the directory in the fourth part, sub-section C that runs from numbers 143-160.
According to the directory, the term mixed marriage refers to any marriage between a catholic and a baptized Christian who is not in full communion with the Catholic Church. May be the question that we can asked at this moment is that; why should the church allow her members to get married to people of different denominations. According to the directory the answer is simply that, in all marriages the primary concern of the church is to uphold the strength and stability of the indissoluble marital union and the family life that flows from it (144). Even though the Church allows mixed marriage, it still advocates for the perfect union that constitutes the married state namely; a full sharing of life in the same faith of the community.
In our discussions today, we firstly looked at the topics which can be taken up while preparing a couple that is about to enter into a mixed marriage. The group members gave three important elements to be kept in mind namely; instructing the couple about the meaning of marriage, its end and property. The couple should be made aware of the meaning of marriage and the commitment they are about to embrace that demands a permanent union or partnership of life. Secondly the couple should also be instructed about the canonical conditions that demands from the parents to give catholic baptism to their children and also the task of educating them.
This instruction demands a spiritual condition for the formation of their faith and practice. The stress should also be kept on the things or values that unite them in their Christian life more especially the life of grace, faith, hope, love and the interior gifts of the Holy Spirit. The couple should seek to foster all that can lead to unity and harmony.
Some of the questions the couple should discuss before making a decision to enter into a mixed marriage are as follows; the most important question to be discussed should be on prayer and Sunday worship. This requires knowing when and where they should have their prayers together. The second question should be based on how to rise up the children and also settling cultural matters if they are not from the same cultural background. Each person should seek to learn more about his/her partner’s religious convictions, teachings and religious practices of the church to which one belongs.
It should be noted that mixed marriage can take place with the permission from the Local Ordinary in case of the catholic getting married to a non-Catholic. When the marriage has taken place, the only thing the catholic partner can do to make sure that the catholic faith is transmitted to the children is firstly to see that the children are baptized and also registered in the church.
In the celebration of a mixed marriage in the catholic church, the role that might be assigned to the minister representing the non- catholic partner according to the directory are; offering an appropriate prayer, reading from the scripture, giving a brief exhortation and also blessing the couple. These are the same roles that can also be granted to minister representing the catholic partner.
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